Recently, an elderly woman drove her car through the front of a business. It's not the first time this has happened, it won't be the last. Of course, this errant driver used the same excuse as every other old fart who ever had a similar accident. The gas pedal stuck. I have never in my life heard anyone under the age of 70 use this excuse. Ever. It's absolutely amazing how the gas pedals of these cars know the age of the driver. Must have something to do with the types of cars the drive. As people get older and start shrinking and losing control of their own bodily functions, they decide it's the best time to buy the biggest piece of machinery the can get their shaking, wrinkled little hands on. I guess they figure if they are leaving this world soon, they're taking as many people as they can with them. "If I'm gonna be plowing through a crowded market, I ain't doin' it in no compact." I don't mean to be making light of this issue. I apologize to anybody who has been a victim of such an accident. I just felt the need to say something, and, as anyone who reads my blogs knows, I always try to include a bit of humor. The key word there is "try".

Oops! Sorry!...
My "enter" key stuck.

Thank you for your time.

There is a serious drug problem in this country. That's what "they" keep telling us. Apparently, a person can go to just about any street corner in any city, hand money to a complete stranger and get drugs in return. All without so much as a "hello", "goodbye" or "thanks".
I know this is true because I've seen it happen on many, many television shows. Mind you, I've never actually seen it happen in real life. But it must happen all the time. Don Johnson alone must have gone under cover and done it dozens of times. I have bought some pretty hard core drugs though. Just this morning I took part in a major deal. I know it was a major deal because I had to show I.D. and sign a waiver. To buy Sudafed. You know, the little red nasal decongestant. Sudafed. I had to sign a waiver to buy over the counter snot pills. It was actually kind of intimidating. Sort of like the first time I bought condoms. Now, I've heard the reason for this Sudafed buying procedure. It seems some clever scumbags have figured out a way to use Sudafed to make crystal meth. Well, now that they have to show I.D. and sign a waiver, I'm sure they will give up and get a legitimate job. Yep. That's what's going to happen. There will be no more meth on the streets now that we have to sign for our snot medication. Damn, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside knowing that our mighty government is kicking ass in the war on drugs. I guess I better go out and stock up on Flintstones vitamins before the big crack down on those. I gotta go now... my nose is starting to run.

Thank you for your time.