This time of year, here in the United States, radio stations play a lot of "patriotic" songs. Some of them actually are patriotic. "God Bless The USA", "ROCK In The USA", "Livin' In America", etc, etc. But the one that seems to get the most airplay, around here, anyway, is "Born In The USA" by Bruce Springsteen. I'm guessing that the people who think this is a patriotic song have never actually payed attention to the lyrics. The chorus that people sing so proudly is actually meant to be sarcastic. The song itself is a criticism of how badly the government treats its citizens. Hardly patriotic. Of course, these days, it's all the rage to criticize the government. So maybe when people play that song loud and proud on July 4th, they're really just protesting one thing or another. Or maybe they just like the way the music sounds. As for me, while I'm watching those fireworks light up the night sky, I'll be rocking out to the sounds of "Shake Your Love" by Debbie Gibson.

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I've mentioned before that I'm no fan of jazz. Especially when it's played by lame white guys. (Kenny G, anybody?) So, let me tell you about last Friday night. The wife insists I join her at her favorite watering hole. Fair enough. Who doesn't enjoy a drink on a Friday night? As I'm on my way in the door I hold it open for about a dozen escapees from the local old folks home. After the Ben-gay pride parade passes, I turn to go in when I see a guy carrying a guitar case coming toward me. So I hold the door open for him. This gives me a good look at him as he approaches. Short, dumpy white guy, goatee, square black frame glasses, and rolled up khakis revealing Jesus sandals. I know immediately I'm in for an evening of lame white guy jazz. Don't get me wrong...this guy was talented. For all I know he may be the best in the world at what he does. He had this weird looking 8 string guitar and he played rhythm and lead simultaneously. I was impressed by his ability but totally turned off by the noises he was making. Again, not my cup of tea. So I drank. And ate a little. But mostly drank. It didn't help. No matter how pickled your brain gets, it doesn't help the time in hell any more tolerable. I get the same effect when I have to listen to country music. But these are the sacrifices one makes when one is trying to keep one's spouse happy. I guess. I don't really know.

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For some reason, the subject of religion crossed my mind while I was showering this morning. I was thinking about why people feel the need for religion. I basically believe that people put their faith into invisible deities because they have no faith in themselves. That being said, I have to say I have no problem with religion. Any religion. Scientology is mocked because it is based on aliens and spacecraft (among other things), but is that any more far-fetched than a man who performed miracles? Including coming back from the dead? Or how about those Old Testament stories about men living hundreds of years and siring thousands of children? And don't get me started on Adam and Eve. Some people think the Mormons are nuts because their religion was started by a snake oil salesman. But, hey, weren't they all? As far as I know, and I admit, that's not much, Buddhism is the only major religion based upon the teaching of an actual living, breathing human being whose existence can actually be proved. I don't know what that means, but I just thought I'd mention it. I have to go now, it's Rosary time. May your God(s) be with you.

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What does it take to be considered an expert in something? I was thinking about this as I was putting gas into my car this morning. I noticed that the price of gas had actually dropped at this particular station. That's not what the "experts" said was going to happen. The "experts" said gas would be over $4 a gallon and possibly be pushing $5 a gallon by Independence Day. It seems that every time the price of gas starts to go up, some "expert" goes on TV telling us to get ready to sell all our worldly possessions in order to fill up the old gas guzzler. Then, when the price of gas starts to drop, the same "experts" tell us it might even get below $2 a gallon or less! Man, that kind of "expertise" must take decades of education an experience.

It's not just gas "experts" either. Last year, weather "experts" predicted the worst hurricane season in recorded history. Then, when not a single major storm approached the U.S., they went on TV and said "never mind". Just like that character Gilda Radner used to play on SNL. And the "experts" who make sports predictions are almost NEVER right. Yet networks and magazines still pay these people for their predictions. Makes me wonder how one earns the title of "expert". Maybe all it takes to be an expert is to spout out whatever thought crosses into your feeble little mind. Then get paid for it. An expert who doesn't get compensation for his opinion is just a blow-hard know-it-all windbag. So, if I can get somebody to pay me for writing this useless crap, then I can start calling myself an "expert".

Thank you for your time.